Before I begin this story, let me just say that I totally notice that this blog is beginning to revolve around Josh. I tried really hard to think of a funny story worth telling that he was not a part of but when you’re 27 and you’ve spent nearly half of your life with the same person, that person is bound to be in most of your stories. Plus he’s really cute so I like to talk about him 🙂
When I was 15, I was riding home with Josh and our friend Laura when Laura mentioned that her older boyfriend always let her drive his car. For about 10 seconds I was shocked because I’m a rule follower and I couldn’t believe she and her boyfriend would be so dumb/brave to break such a major law. But by the 11th second, I wanted to try it. Doing things that could get me into trouble was completely out of my element. I was terrified of disappointing my mom so I usually just stuck to behaving. But at 15, I was entering into an age of testing my limits and if my friends were doing it…
I started begging Josh to let me drive his car the rest of the way. We were literally just down the street from my house so what was the harm? He was hesitant but, just the same as he does today, he gave into my wants after a little pleading and convincing. He pulled over onto a sort of back road leaving me with a one minute drive consisting of a straight a way and two turns.
I had never driven before. Not even a little bit. I don’t think I had ever even held the wheel. Naturally, I started driving with two feet. Right foot on the gas, left foot on the break. Josh, who was in the passenger’s seat, and Laura, who was in the back seat, cracked up laughing as I drove 5 miles an hour with two feet. But the laughing stopped as soon as we saw a cop pull out behind me. Well, Josh’s laughing stopped. Laura continued to cackle even harder.
Seriously? A cop? What are the chances? The town that I grew up in had like, two cops total. How was one of them in this exact random location at the exact moment that I had chosen to break the law? And I had JUST gotten into the driver’s seat. Needless to say Josh and I were scared. Actually, I started crying. I panicked and started crying and telling Josh that I couldn’t drive under the pressure and I just needed to pull over and let him have the driver’s seat back. But he was too scared to stop. He reassured me that I was almost home and that I could do it. Then he started yelling at me for driving too slow. I remember he said, “You know you can get pulled over for driving too slow, right?” Uh, no dude. I didn’t know that. Because I was 15 without a license or even a permit, and I’d never driven before. His yelling and criticizing just made me cry even more. We had only been dating for a few months and we’d never even had a fight, let alone been in such a high stress situation together. I kept repeating that I was so sorry and I didn’t want him to lose his license for letting me drive. My friend Laura just kept laughing and I imagine she was repeating “Oh my God, guys. Oh my God.”
I got to the end of the road, stopped at the stop sign and veeeerrrry carefully made a left turn. I got to the next stop sign, which was only a few feet from where I had just turned, and stopped again. The cop turned and continued to follow me. After a few cars drove past, I was able to cross the street while still driving with two feet. At this point I was only one right turn and 200 yards from my house. And then the cop turned. THE COP TURNED! I was thanking God and finally breathing again. Josh immediately told me to pull over and switched seats with me. I joined Laura in laughing about the entire thing, which was all just too crazy, and continued to apologize to Josh for putting him in that situation. He made the last right turn and was just about to pull into my driveway when that pesky cop pulled around onto my street. He was coming up the opposite direction and as he approached us, he rolled his window down so he could talk to Josh. Josh stopped the car, literally in front of my house, and rolled his window down as well. The cop said, “Is everything alright? Are you guys lost?” and Josh replied, “Oh, we just found it!” and pointed to my house. And that was it. The cop drove away and we made it home with no trouble. And then Laura and I continued to die laughing while Josh was just annoyed. Needless to say, Josh never let me drive again until it was legal. Still to this day, he criticizes my driving.